Chapter 75: Covenants

"Hearken diligently unto me, and remember the words which I have spoken; and come unto the Holy One of Israel, and feast upon that which perisheth not, neither can be corrupted, and let your soul delight...behold how great the covenants of the Lord, and how great his condescensions unto the children of men; and because of his greatness, and his grace and mercy..."

2 Nephi 9:51,53

A very interesting week and honestly, quite a difficult one. Last Monday I contracted COVID-19 and so this entire week I have been suffering with my symptoms and quarantining in the flat with my companion Elder Lambert. We were originally meant to be in Aberdeen and Inverness this week, but unfortunately we weren't able to do that. It's been hard to reconcile what I wanted to have happen and what my reality was, and such hardship was compounded by a very real and very burdensome virus. However, this week I was blessed with time to reflect and reevaluate and I felt the Spirit teach me many truths which will be important as I head into the final quarter of my mission.

I struggle at times to discern between the voice of The Spirit and that of The Adversary when it comes to my own personal development because more often than not, I feel great, internal tension between who I am and who I really want to be. Satan tells me constantly that much of who I am is and never will be enough to qualify for any real happiness, at least not the happiness I desire for my life. It seems my shortcomings and weakness are always exposed right before me and Satan harps on them in an attempt to discourage me from pressing forward. Sometimes he succeeds.

Other times, however, although not nearly as much as I would like, I remember the covenants I have made with God and with Christ. I remember that his promises are not ones of grief or pain or discouragement, but rather of greatness, grace and mercy. As I remember, I know that because of my desires to follow the example of the Saviour and my actions to strive and do so, his grace is present in my life.

This gives me a lot of peace as I face life.

Covenants bring power: they establish confidence and courage, they instill within us the love of God, and they cause our souls to delight. Covenants are acts of mercy: God willingly asks so little and so simply of us in hopes of being able to bless us immensely as we do so. Covenants are eternal, for no matter what we may say or do here in this life, the promises we make and keep with God will be sure in their rewards which may only partially reaped in this life. But covenants additionally give us the hope that all we may see as unfair or unjust will one day be made right as we are made whole through Christ's power and grace.

I love this life and I only hope to secure myself to God through doing my best to live the covenants I have made. I'm grateful for his condescensions unto me, for he truly lifts me in my weakness and allows me to accomplish many things through his grace in spite of my many imperfections.

I know and testify he will always do the same for you.

Life is good.

God is wise.

Don't give up.

Elder Childers

My first ever positive covid test

Elder Lambert and I making chicken strips

Our amazing companionship