Chapter 71: A New Beginning

"Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit."

Ecclesiastes 7:8

Well another week and somehow everything seems to be different. Elder Klintworth is gone home, Elder Kulmayer is in Ireland working away, we got new missionaries in the mission, my old companion Elder Yorgason is now serving here in Edinburgh, and I sleep on the bottom bunk now which is great. Amid all these changes, I feel different, like somehow I have more responsibility and that more relies on my own abilities which hasn't been easy.

I feel stressed, but at the same time, I find a lot of peace from this scripture in Ecclsiastes. I feel like I had a lot going for me this past little bit: all of my older mission friends were here and I was having a lot of fun doing really good and rewarding work. That era has come to an end. This week, I had to redefine who I was and who I wanted to be, set some good goals, and just think about the time I have left on my mission.

If you know me at all you'll know that I set pretty high bars for myself, but I love as well that this scripture counsels me to be patient as I experience change. It's very easy to be prideful and become discouraged when things don't go the way we want them to. However, I know that there is spiritual power in simply taking a step back and realizing that all lasting, personal change comes incrementally. We must be patient with ourselves, others, and our surroundings and "cheerfully do all things that lie in our power" until we see "all things work together for [our] good" (D&C 123:17, Romans 8:28).

That is the pattern of the happy life I believe, and I believe it is the pattern of true faith and discipleship. I feel happy knowing that as I continue to do what I can to be a good leader, example, and friend, that God will help and bless me to be a more effective instrument in his hands. It doesn't matter what my ability is now, only my availability to change, and as I prove my dependability through earnest effort, then I know that the Lord will increase my capability to accomplish all He needs me to (Neal A. Maxwell).

I hope I can be better at keeping this perspective. Like I said, I have a lot of goals I am working on to hopefully really help me become something better. If I've learned anything here in my time in Edinburgh, it's that getting a lot of things done means nothing if I'm not becoming anything in the process. It's easy to be caught in the "thick of thin things" as President Monson once said, and become distracted from what is really important: our personal relationship with God and with the Saviour. I'm eager to increase my efforts to more fully rely on them and hopefully become better equipped to hear the Spirit's promptings and respond promptly to them. I encourage you all to do the same, to have many "new beginnings" as you repent each day and seek to become better.

I know of no other way to cultivate true happiness rooted in the example of Jesus Christ.

Life is good.

God is wise.

Don't give up.

Elder Childers

Sunset on Pratts Hill

Me with the sunset

My great companions

Working away in the office cause it flooded from our flat! Pipes broke somehow

Back in Airdrie. Did a great mini exchange with the Elders there

Elder Kulmayer on the floor after a long day

Me and my good friend Elder Yorgason together again